Savage Heartache (Corona Pride Book 3) Read online

  Once inside his office, he settled into the old chair he’d commandeered from the faculty storage closet. The chair creaked if he leaned to one side, and the stuffing was held together by duct tape. Jameson loved it.

  He leaned back and thought about poetry, and Yeats. When you are old and grey… Willow hadn’t had a chance to become old and gray. That had been taken from her, and he hadn’t been able to stop it. Before her death five years ago, Jameson had written poems for her, scrawling them out on scraps of paper, stuffing them into her cookbooks, taping them to the bathroom mirror, or tucking them into her dresser drawers.

  He hadn’t written down a single line since she died.

  He had so many poems in his head now, he didn’t know what to do with them. He felt like the words and stanzas would explode outward, taking over the clouds, writing themselves in the stars, blinding him like the sun. But nothing ever happened. He swallowed the poems, and they disappeared.

  Willow had told him that she wanted him to be happy. That if something ever happened to one of them, the other should move on. Take time to grieve, she’d said as she lay dying, and then be happy. She’d cupped his cheek in her slender hand before taking her last breath, and then the life left her eyes.

  Jameson shut the image out of his mind. He’d taken time to grieve—he’d done that part right. Then be happy? How? He didn’t know, and he didn’t care to figure it out.

  His phone buzzed in his briefcase again, and Jameson muttered a curse under his breath. But he had to check. As alpha, it was his job. They knew when his class hours were, and they didn’t disturb him then unless there was an emergency. But office hours were fair game for texts and calls.

  Another message from Rex, just like he’d guessed. It’s very shiny.

  He jabbed out a text of his own. If you don’t have any real information to share, leave me alone.

  He saw the three dots on his phone screen as Rex replied. He turned the phone over. Not worth it. Not worth getting grumpy about.

  The minutes ticked by as Jameson watched the sun playing against the leaves outside his window, spring in the air, people wanting to get out, move around. His grizzly wanted out, too, wanted nothing more than to go back to the Ring of Fire and roam around their territory, forgetting the human things that plagued them. He’d tour the perimeter of the property and think about how best to handle the problems in the clan. No unity, no community. Asshole Jake, as Gemma and Rex called the problem. Jake had been a problem for two years, and Jameson kept hoping things would improve on their own.

  Just this morning, though, another one of the clan members, Nolan, had confessed his most recent premonition to Jameson. “Things are gonna change,” Nolan had said, “and it ain’t gonna be pretty.”

  Two years was long enough. Whether the change was pretty or not, it was time for Jameson to take charge of his clan.

  Three

  Nina stepped into the cabin at Gemma’s side. “It’s not much,” Gemma said, “but it’ll hold you for as long as you like.”

  A drafting table stood adjacent to the front window, and Nina could already see a modem blinking from a shelf next to it.

  “This place has an internet connection?” Nina asked.

  “It’s not wireless,” Gemma said, “but it works.”

  “I can even get work done here,” Nina mused. “This place, wow. I just can’t get over how perfect it is.”

  She looked around the rest of the cabin. It had a front room with a kitchen and tiny dining set to one side, the drafting table at the window near the door, and then a couch and a coffee table at the other. Distressed hardwood flooring, some shag throw rugs. A door led to a bedroom at the back, and Nina walked through. The bed was bare—no sheets or blankets.

  Gemma followed her into the bedroom and noticed Nina’s gaze. “I’ve got some extras at my place that I can bring over for you to borrow. Same thing with towels.”

  “Thank you,” Nina said. She peeked into the bathroom. The fiberglass shower was stained, but it looked clean at least. Same with the toilet and sink. “This place is exactly what I needed.”

  “Great,” Gemma said. “And don’t worry about what Rex said about Jameson. The alpha’s cranky, but he’ll totally love you.”

  Nina barely heard her, she was so entranced with the rooms. Maybe she could convince the alpha to let her stay more than just a few days—maybe a week or two. She could get caught up on her reading and on her blog, and post more reviews and get extra steam going with advertisements. She had so many big dreams—more features she wanted to include, more voices, more books. More HEAs. That was what it was all about. Happily-ever-afters for one and all.

  Except for Nina.

  “So…bags?” Gemma prompted. “I can help you carry things in.”

  “Oh, yeah,” Nina said, smiling. “I think I can get it on my own, though.”

  “Sure thing,” Gemma said.

  But it seemed Gemma didn’t have anything better to do, because she followed Nina right back out to the Chevy and leaned against it while Nina gathered her bags.

  “Ooh, Nina’s Romance Spectacular!” Gemma exclaimed, pointing to Nina’s canvas tote. “I love that blog. It’s like…I needed it. I came across it five years ago, right when it was starting up. It was before I found Rex, and I was so freaking lonely and sad it wasn’t even funny. Like, literally. I was depressed. Spending too much time doing a job I didn’t love, searching for Rex, trying to figure out my way in the world. Books were my only escape.”

  She stopped to take a breath. Nina opened her mouth to say something, but Gemma was already going again. Nina smiled to herself. She liked Gemma, and she liked her many, many words.

  “So anyway, I started reading Romance Spectacular, and it changed my life. I read more romance novels. I started demanding more from myself and the HEAs I saw in books. It was possible, I decided, to find my own HEA. I didn’t know how I was going to do it, but I was determined as hell.” She laughed, and Nina did, too.

  “How long have you been reading the blog?” Gemma asked.

  Nina cleared her throat. “Well…I told you my name was Nina, right?”

  “Ho-ly shit. No way,” Gemma said. “No way. You’re Nina? The Nina?”

  “That’s me.” Nina gave her a weak smile.

  “So…that guy you were writing about? That’s you? That’s him, somewhere out there, and that’s why you’re on the run?”

  Nina frowned. “Well, not on the run, exactly. I mean. I’m just taking a break.”

  “And you’re a shifter!” Gemma said. “This is, like. Whoa. I can’t hardly believe this. Of course you wouldn’t come out over your blog, because, well, it’s a huge secret and everything. But I never knew! Never even suspected. I’m such a fan, though. Wow. I feel like I’m meeting a kindred spirit slash celebrity.”

  Nina smiled the biggest smile she’d worn in weeks. “I’m so glad I met you. You are seriously making my day. My month, even.”

  “Okay, let’s get you settled,” Gemma said. “Afterward, we’ll have a cookout to celebrate that you’re here. I’ll send some of the guys on a beer run.”

  “Sounds great,” Nina said. She still wore that silly grin. She had a fan! She had met a real life fan. It was too cool.

  “All right, let’s—” Gemma’s words died on her lips when a big-ass Ford pick-up pulled into the camp, stopping next to one of the cabins. Many of the cabins had little pots of flowers next to them, tiny homey touches. This one was bare on the outside. The door wasn’t even painted the same cerulean blue as the others.

  Nina felt her eyes go wide as the biggest, most muscular dude hopped out of the pick-up. Brown hair, maybe a little too long, like he hadn’t cared about his appearance. Bright blue eyes, practically glowing with intensity.

  “Rex!” he yelled.

  Egads, even his voice was alpha-y. Low. Sexy. Nina reached to the side of her own truck for support. Come on Phil, don’t let me down now. Her knees were totally letting her down, th
ough.

  She wanted to crumple to the ground and bare her belly like a wolf to declare she was his. She wanted to lick him. His muscles were clearly defined, even through the long-sleeved shirt he wore. They probably didn’t make shirts for guys his size. Hell, they didn’t make guys his size. Anywhere.

  He walked over to Gemma, his gaze flicking over Nina dismissively, before he asked, “Where’s your mate?”

  Gemma batted her eyelashes at him. “Why, I don’t know.”

  The alpha growled. “Who the hell is this?” He pointed to Nina, and Nina felt all the lust she’d been feeling explode into irritation.

  Nina straightened her shoulders. Pointing to herself, she said, “This is Nina Vidal, and this is asking to stay in the empty cabin over there for a few days. This can also pay rent.”

  The man blew out a breath of exasperation. “I don’t think so.”

  Gemma stomped her foot. “Now listen—”

  “I don’t think so,” he said again, his voice quiet with authority.

  Gemma closed her mouth.

  Rex came out of his cabin and held his hand up in a friendly wave. “Jameson. So glad you could rejoin us. Nina here is going to be staying with us for a few days. Gemma’s already getting her set up in Cabin 5, and it’s gonna be great, don’t you think?”

  “No, I don’t think,” Jameson said. “I have my reasons.”

  “Now, Jamesers, don’t be rude,” Rex said. “I already told her—”

  “I don’t care what you told her.”

  Nina stood up to her full height, despite the way her hormones made her want to lie down on the ground and expose her neck to this man. His alpha powers were strong, but she was going to be the feisty, spunky heroine stereotype and get her own way this time.

  “Listen,” she said, “I know you don’t want me around because, well, reasons. Reasons which you aren’t sharing, but reasons nonetheless. But I could really use a place to stay. I was hoping a week or two, but if I can just stay three days, I’ll get out of your fur.”

  His mouth was a thin line of stubbornness. “Out of the question.”

  The alpha’s gaze was burning bright. His nostrils flared as he looked at her, and Nina wondered what it was that had him all riled up. She’d just arrived—she hadn’t been able to piss anyone off yet. Hell, she was going to chip in for the beer run Gemma had planned.

  “Gemma, take Nina to the general store,” Rex said, as if reading Nina’s mind. “We need more booze for tonight.”

  “Tonight?” Jameson said.

  “Nina’s welcome party,” Rex said.

  “I already told you, it’s out of the question. She’s just gonna stir up trouble. Am I not the fucking alpha, or what?”

  “Oh, you’re the fucking alpha,” Rex said. “But Nina’s going to claim sanctuary.”

  Nina opened her mouth to ask what he was talking about, but then Gemma nudged her. “Uh, that’s right,” Nina said. “Of course. I’m going to claim sanctuary. I’m doing that now. I’m claiming the hell out of sanctuary.”

  At the gobsmacked expression on Jameson’s face, Nina felt one thing only: smug.

  No, there was definitely some lust swirled in with that smugness, but she nixed that part quick.

  “Right then,” Rex said. “Now that that’s done, let’s get some beer and hot dogs for tonight.”

  Four

  Jameson frowned and stared at Rex, Gemma, and Nina in turn. He quickly looked away from Nina. He wanted to let his gaze linger a little too much. Even now, as he glared at Rex, he saw the after-image of Nina imprinted on his mind. Skinny jeans hugging long legs, a t-shirt with a beer logo, soft wavy hair piled high in a ponytail. And those hazel eyes, flashing with irritation and something more.

  She was like a kid compared to him—she couldn’t be twenty-five, even, and he was thirty-six.

  He shouldn’t stare, but his damn eyes kept going back to her.

  It made him feel like a cranky old lech.

  Worried that his staring was becoming obvious, he bit out, “She didn’t even know about the sanctuary rule.”

  “She did too,” Rex insisted. “Or, at least, she does now.”

  “Asshole,” Jameson said.

  “So I claim sanctuary,” Nina was saying in that melodic voice of hers. “What does that mean?”

  He bet she could sing. He bet she could make lullabies weep. He bet she could read a poem and bring even his antsiest class of freshmen students to tears.

  He wanted to hear her read. He wanted to hear her sing. He wanted to hear her moan his name while his lips were locked on her shoulder and his cock was buried deep inside her—

  Shaking himself out of the daydream, he frowned. This wasn’t okay. He didn’t want this. Willow had wanted him to move on, but not like this. And even if he did move on…no. Given the state of his clan right now, with Asshole Jake messing everything up and Nolan having those weird premonitions, nope. He couldn’t let Nina stay.

  “Listen,” he said to Gemma, Rex, and Nina. “This isn’t going to work. You don’t actually need sanctuary.”

  “Do too,” Nina said. “My alpha’s going to be pissed I cut out on the pride.”

  She bit her lip, and Jameson held back a groan of desire.

  “Who’s your alpha? What pride?” he asked.

  “Corona,” she said.

  “Shit.” He knew Marlana by reputation. If he didn’t take care of Nina the right way, he’d have the Corona Pride on his back, trying to take more territory. He’d have the attention of a badass group of mountain lions. His clan was messed up enough as it was. “Shit. Fuck.”

  “So…that barbecue?” Rex asked, unhelpfully.

  “I gotta go,” Jameson said. “Evening patrol.”

  “We’ve got Nolan and Margot on that,” Rex said.

  “I’ll relieve them,” Jameson said. “And you,” he said, pointing at Nina. “If you’re going to stay, you’re going to earn your keep.”

  “I have money. Name your price for rent, I’ll pay it.”

  “Don’t want your money, kitty,” he said.

  She opened her mouth like she was about to argue, probably thinking he had some sick sexual fantasy he wanted her to play out. The thought wasn’t unwelcome in his mind…except it was, because he was determined not to think about her and sick sexual fantasies.

  Maybe later, in the shower.

  He held a finger up. He wanted to press it to her lips but was afraid of touching her, afraid of igniting the lust that already felt all-consuming. “I’ve got chores around here that need doing. I don’t need money, just labor. So you can work off your rent.”

  “Fine,” she said, her cheeks pink at the apples, probably with annoyance.

  Ooh, he liked her all fired up like this. “Fine,” he repeated.

  Her voice was sassy when she said, “What do you need, hmm? Dishes? Laundry? I don’t fold underwear.”

  “Nope, nothing indoors. I can fold my own underwear.” He smirked. “Or I would, if I wore underwear.”

  Her cheeks got even pinker. He loved that.

  “No,” he said, wanting to crowd into her space, but all too aware of the audience of his clan members around them. “Our property is looking pretty scraggly, over on the portion behind my cabin. Lots of old dead trees that need to be cleared. That’ll be all on you.”

  Her face fell, and now he let his own expression shine through. He felt it. Smug.

  With that, he tore off his shirt and walked toward his cabin. He chucked his shirt at the door, then his shoes and pants. Naked, he let the bear burst free until he was all grizzly. He let off a roar at the forest behind his cabin, and charged through.

  This…this mountain lion woman. She shouldn’t be here. She was going to make it even harder for him to achieve that tenuous balance of community and leadership that his clan needed. Worse, she was messing with the balance inside of him, the balance of getting over Willow’s death and leading this clan the way it needed to be led. He had enough proble
ms and concerns on a daily basis. Adding someone new to the mix was going to mess everything up.

  Awful, all of it.

  Awful the way she’d bit her lip in concern when she’d mentioned her alpha. Awful how he’d wanted to bite that lip for her. Taste the flush on her cheeks, trail his mouth over the soft skin of her neck. How pretty. How warm.

  He bet she was warm and tight.

  And his bear, oh, the grizzly wanted her.

  He ran through the forest, eating up the miles. An hour passed, maybe two. Nolan and Margot’s daily patrol was probably long over, and everyone would relax for the evening. He came back around to stand behind one of the cabins and shifted back to human.

  His clan had built a fire, and everyone sat around it. Nina was getting introduced. Jake’s eyes were locked on Nina, and neither Jameson nor the grizzly inside him liked it.

  He watched while Jake brought Nina a beer and sat next to her. Too close. Jameson bit back a growl. Tried to look away. Couldn’t.

  What was this? What did it mean? He hadn’t been so obsessed with a woman since…hell. Since Willow. He hadn’t even looked at a woman since Willow. What was this? He couldn’t answer. He had no answers, and he was afraid to answer.

  Jake did the stupid, classic maneuver of stretching his arms out and trying to settle one around Nina’s shoulders.

  Jameson held back a laugh, because Nina clearly wasn’t falling for it. She scootched down the bench on that biteable, heart-shaped ass of hers. Jameson wanted to see her naked so bad it hurt. Literally. His cock was straining, and he had to get this under control.

  Suddenly Rex called out, “Come on over, alpha! We’ve got plenty of hot dogs and wieners. Lots of wieners.”

  Everyone laughed. Jameson shook his head. He needed to cover up his own wiener before he went over there.

  “Be right there,” he said, and calmed himself down before walking into his cabin. He used the back door, so nobody would see his aroused state. Caused by Nina.

  It wasn’t like there were no available women in the clan. The sisters, Margot and Erena, were both single, although he thought Erena and Jake had something going on the side. Maybe not, if Jake was trying to pick up Nina.